Monday, December 27, 2010

The Courage !!!!

Letting go of someone you love is never easy. The truth of it is, once any bond is made it's hard to break that bond. Just like welding, when two things are bonded together, to get them apart something has to be broken. When people bond they bond at their heart, so unfortunately, when you break a bond you're heart is where the bond has to be broken, thus the pain of heartbreak. There are so many times in life when you have to let go of someone you love, but that doesn't mean letting go of love.
It almost been a year and i still can't let go. I've question myself many times. What is going on with me?? There's a guy who very care and concern me but why do my heart still keep holding to the past? It is so hurt to face reality that i have to keep going on without you at my side. 
The most painful experience in life is to let go of someone you love. Everybody has somebody whom they love unconditionally. To create this bond, a strong relationship is created from very early years.
LOVE - What exactly is LOVE? How am I supposed to let go of someone I love, if I'm not even sure what love is? As for letting it go, well, I'm not sure I've ever had hold of it in the first place. What is love anyway? You see I thought love was my friend. I thought it was, no, IS, my BEST FRIEND.
INSECURITY - It's one of the most terrifying emotions in existence. I know what insecurity feels like, and I've no doubt what so ever, ,I have it. Is it a disease? Perhaps it's a bacterial infection, and by simply taking some sort of antibiotic, it will just, go away. Then again, maybe it won't. What I do know is; I don't trust love. Trust must be missing. I suppose I need to let go of love, because they say, "If you LOVE, let love go. If love comes back to you, it's yours. If love does not return, it was never yours to begin with.
Ending a relationship is hard to do, no matter what the relationship your ending entailed. Sometimes even quitting a job that you hate can be hard, if you like the people you work with. It isn't so much the relationship ending that is the hard part, it is usually the change that comes from ending a relationship that is what is hard. The routine that you establish during a relationship can become comforting, and gives you a sense of normalcy. When that sense of normalcy is broken, it can feel like life itself is strange, and you scramble for that sense of normal to come back.
I still missing our old times. I'm not dare to step forward cause i know every moment, every thing i do is remind me of you. I'm lost. I actually don't know what love meaning to me. If i be able to know i'm sure i won't be so suffering. I know is my fault and i'm also know that we cannot turn back time. I really wish we can turn back to normal but what i can do now is let God arrange everything. What i wanted to do is run away from tis place. Is too much memory about me and you. I really wanted to run away !!!!

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